tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-39368088590460846332012-01-10T02:52:19.925-08:00Love never appear until u learn to give...but u will never get love although u give...the world is cruel...just how thing r...* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.comBlogger291100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-47709720491906448742012-01-10T02:23:00.000-08:002012-01-10T02:52:19.949-08:00When they are close it feels so warm<div>Somehow it feels like they are slowly getting further</div><div>At time it's like some are disappearing </div><div>Turns out no one was disappearing </div><div>The one disappearing was her</div><div>It was her all along</div><div>The fear of disappearing without being notice slow build up</div><div>Eventually becoming someone that she don't even know</div><div>Giving up and stop hoping for anything</div><div>Until the one person appear</div><div>The one that was always by her side</div><div>The one that stop her from disappearing </div><div>The one that didn't forget her</div><div><br /></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-4770972049190644874?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-75965625919101947592012-01-10T02:07:00.000-08:002012-01-10T02:20:29.355-08:00Doesn't matter how long I waits<div>No matter how much I hope</div><div>Things that are not meant to be will never be</div><div>There is no point in hoping and waiting for something that is never going to happen</div><div>It's time to throw away my dream </div><div>To tear it to pieces and burn them </div><div>Letting it vanish into the air</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-7596562591910194759?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-34770994362736347992011-10-06T08:57:00.000-07:002011-10-06T09:07:59.474-07:00I am afraid that thing will not go back to way it used to be<div>I am afraid I will disappear without you knowing</div><div>I don't want to go on in this silent</div><div>I want to break down this thick wall between us</div><div>I am afraid of getting used to this silent, loneliness and cold life</div><div>I want to feel the warm hug and love you used to give me</div><div>I want to be laughing and smiling together</div><div>So don't leave me standing there</div><div>Alone and empty </div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-3477099436273634799?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-32255760928871792552011-10-06T08:37:00.001-07:002011-10-06T08:55:50.891-07:00Just when I think I am no longer invisible<div>You remind me that I am</div><div>How long is it going to go on?</div><div>When will you look at me?</div><div>Will I never exist in your eyes from now on?</div><div>Are you going to shut me out?</div><div> </div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-3225576092887179255?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-35957411641979210282011-06-17T01:54:00.000-07:002011-09-16T01:52:44.413-07:00One morning I woke up from dream/nightmare that I was pregnant. I didn't have the big tummy just knew that I was pregnant. For some reason I kept feeling my tummy like hoping the child inside me would disappear. The thought of me having a baby terrified me so much that I just want to break down and cry. The thought of miscarriage even made me happy. I feel so bad that I even had that thought. I don't know why being pregnant made me so scared when I love baby.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-3595741164197921028?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-5446638415834948532011-01-09T04:14:00.000-08:002011-09-16T01:50:03.129-07:00I never wan to be attach to anyone cause when we separate it feels so lonely. I never ever wan to feel lonely again so let stay like this forever. I dun wan to feel so helpless, hurt and pain. When we separate it feels like there's a wall between us that can't be broken down. It really hurt to know that we will not be able to do all thing that we used to do. It doesn't matter how badly I wan us to be together...in the end it hurts more and all the fun we have can't even heal the wound.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-544663841583494853?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-78107737632850253442010-10-25T04:58:00.000-07:002010-10-25T05:18:33.826-07:00Tomorrow is the day everything finally comes to an end. I will be free of everything that have been trouble to me. Soon I will be able to life freely. Finally I only have me to think about. No more teasing, fighting, or even hating. There will only be happy day ahead of me. Tonight I will go to bed thinking of the joyful time only few hours ahead of me. Time may be up and out but knowing of the wonderful time I will have...I still be able to smile although I will lose a friend. Whatever it is I have to keep my words, right...<br />*keep smiling even if it hurts*<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-7810773763285025344?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-23725444369279618452010-10-22T03:22:00.000-07:002010-10-22T03:33:24.709-07:00As day pass, my time slowly fade away. Soon I will have to face him. As time pass I will get stronger and will be able to face him like a stranger. When that day comes, I will end our friendship officially without feeling guilty or sorry. For now all there is to do is to be strong. This way what ever he do or say will not hurt me. I hope when the time come I will be as ready as I will ever be.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-2372544436927961845?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-10041239583287029232010-10-19T08:39:00.000-07:002010-10-19T09:01:06.525-07:00From now on, I just have to do my own stuff. Live my life to the fullness and just enjoy everyday. So starting from now, I just have to walk pass him like we are strangers. But I guess that wouldn't be hard since we don't mean anything to each other. I mean even friend feel uncomfortable if they end their friendship. I do treasure our friendship...but it's just too bad it must end now before thing go bad. I know it wouldn't be hard for him also. I may not be able to erase my past but I can always writing my future. So I'm going to writing them one by one without him. It's just tiring looking back and only remember fighting with him. Although there a couple of nice memories but there are just too many bad memories.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-1004123958328702923?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-40417504402473313642010-10-19T01:41:00.000-07:002010-10-19T02:16:33.738-07:00After so long I finally realise how I really feel about him, turn out I hate him so much that even I can't describe it. But somehow a part of me doesn't find it weird at all, I guess my hatred toward him grow slowly as time pass by. After thinking for a long time...I think I should end our friendship. I guess it's the best since all we ever do is fight. I dun hope to spend my last few month of school life fighting with him. So starting from today I should not talk to him and just mind my own business. I hope that both of us will be able to have a nice end. <br /><br />So when we finish school, let's not meet again. I know this is the oppsite of what normally people say but let's face it...you and I...we dun want to see each other also.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-4041750440247331364?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-29761460987508028272010-02-13T08:51:00.000-08:002010-02-13T09:05:02.588-08:00There are no more turning back<br />I have to live with wat I have done<br />Even if it means <br />I will not be able to smile like I used to or<br />Cry every night<br />I now have nothing but regrets<br />Regrets tat may never go away<br />There nothing else for me to do<br />As much as I want everything back <br />The further they become<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-2976146098750802827?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-35952847229884233692010-01-24T03:19:00.000-08:002010-01-24T03:35:08.443-08:00Call me whatever u wan<br />I dun care wat u say anymore<br />Hate me 4 all u wan coz I'm not giving up<br />Watever u do won't hurt me anymore<br />Even if everyone leaves me<br />U can't hurt me<br />I might suffer from ur action and words<br />But I won't fall or break<br />In ur world where u get everything<br />I will make sure I dun get pull in<br />I'm not goin to play by ur rules anymore<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-3595284722988423369?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-55644050771848742412010-01-15T20:25:00.000-08:002010-01-15T20:44:12.571-08:00No matter how loud I scream <br />Nobody seem to hear me<br />When I'm drowning <br />Nobody seem to see me calling out 4 help<br />When I cry <br />Nobody seem to see my pain<br />If I stand with a knife through my heart<br />No one seem to notice me bleeding<br />It feels like even if I die <br />No one will noe<br />Somehow I wan and dun wan to go back to my past <br />I feel so lost and stuck<br />Will anyone hear me call out 4 help???<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-5564405077184874241?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-69246377831772126282010-01-15T05:02:00.000-08:002010-01-15T05:34:38.157-08:00It's going to be 2 week<br />Everytime I wake up I hope it's all a dream<br />Nothing seem to be a dream<br />Day by day I fall deeper <br />Only time can tell how long I will last<br />Before I live in an empty body<br />My heart beat for no reason<br />I'm numb that I can't feel the pain of my wound<br />My heart is about to be ripped out<br />But I can't do anything but cry in pain<br />Soon there won't be tears to cry<br />Somebody save me before I fall too deep...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-6924637783177212628?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-17418355249001641662009-09-06T20:00:00.000-07:002009-09-06T20:18:21.013-07:00Sorry to break ur hope... But I give up on 26... It's not fun anymore... The longer I shut my mouth the more the wound open and hurt... It's better to stop now before it hurts even more than now... I dun wan to lose anything anymore...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-1741835524900164166?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-11133200071826618072009-09-03T05:39:00.000-07:002009-09-03T06:01:21.551-07:00Hanging on was impossible<br />It was juat a stupid thing to do<br />Cause you will just fall<br />And there will be no one to catch you<br />I didn't want to believe that<br />But the glass broke when I fell<br />Leaving nothing behind but pieces of hope<br />It hurt badly and deeply<br />But there is nothing you can do<br />It will just keep on hurting<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-1113320007182661807?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-32482489550570412352009-08-21T00:03:00.000-07:002009-08-21T00:17:26.233-07:00When you shatter my heart and left me picking them up...<br />I didn't pick them up....<br />I left it there to disappear....<br /><br />When you broke my heart...<br />I didn't put it back together...<br />I left it like a broken thing...<br /><br />When you wounded my heart...<br />I didn't heal it...<br />I left it to bleed....<br /><br />And now I can't love again...<br />Because my heart is locked up in a box...<br />The key to unlock the box is gone...<br />I can't even love the people around me...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-3248248955057041235?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-27342106431785131342009-08-10T04:07:00.000-07:002009-08-10T04:23:33.935-07:00U dun see through ur heart...<br />U dun follow ur heart..<br />U dun feel through ur heart...<br />In the end...<br />U are nothing more than just a body...<br />A body without a soul...<br />Until u find ur heart back....<br />Learn to trust ur heart...<br />And feel with ur heart...<br />I can't never see u as who u are...<br />Never see u like everyone else...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-2734210643178513134?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-35694956353071507712009-08-06T22:09:00.000-07:002009-08-06T22:25:22.033-07:00U r not sumone tat noe everything...<br />There r sumthings tat u will never noe and understand....<br />Stop finding my black book....<br />Just back off...<br />Leave me alone...<br />Stop destroying my life....<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-3569495635307150771?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-22105743805513847432009-07-24T22:53:00.000-07:002011-01-09T04:44:25.174-08:00I no longer feel anything...<br />All my feeling just disappear...<br />I can no longer tell rigth from wrong...<br />I can no longer find happiness from pain...<br />I dun noe if this is a dream o reality...<br />I pretend to not noe so tat I dun get hurt...<br />But the pain is still there<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-2210574380551384743?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-45324337608106416442009-06-26T04:16:00.000-07:002009-06-26T04:33:53.560-07:00I decide to try again....<br />Just to get hurt again...<br />All I have to say is ...<br />Thank for teaching wat hurt feels like...<br />This is the end....<br />No more bleeding...No more hurt...No more waiting...<br />Leave me alone...<br />Dun come near me...<br />All u gave me was empty hope...<br />All my hope,dream,wish was destroy by u...<br />U should just leave it as how it was...<br />Now look at me...<br />Wat i hav become...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-4532433760810641644?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-84620290577540642512009-06-25T06:06:00.000-07:002009-07-18T19:37:56.606-07:00Again...I fall into the hole...<br />Doesn't matter how many time I walk that road...<br />I will fall into the same hole...<br />Knowing what awaits me at the end of road....<br />I still take the same road hopeing the end will be different....<br />The only thing different is the place tat bleed and hurt...<br />This it hurt so much tat...<br />My body feels numb...<br />My soul feels empty...<br />My heart just gave up...<br />In the end...<br />There is no one there to help me...<br />And it doesn't matter how I wait....<br />No one wil come....<br />tats just the curse meant to be carry by HER...ALONE<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-8462029057754064251?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-67545811537286271022009-06-19T22:41:00.000-07:002009-06-19T23:09:02.076-07:00Stop waiting...<br />You know 'it' will never be yours...<br />Just give up and let everthing go...<br />Start a new life without 'it'...<br />You are better of without 'it'...<br />Just know you can do it...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-6754581153728627102?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-792031357696454182009-05-30T05:23:00.000-07:002009-05-30T05:34:13.917-07:00Everytime i forget u....<br />U remind me....<br />Everytime i erase the memories...<br />U create new ones...<br />Everytime i hide myself...<br />U find me...<br />and Everytime i turn around...<br />U r always behind me wih tat look...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-79203135769645418?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-87570969438374508212009-05-14T08:40:00.000-07:002009-05-14T08:57:58.158-07:00If it is a dream....<br />Dun wake me up....<br />Let me sleep forever...<br />Let me live in this sweet dream...<br />Thats was normally people will say...<br />But for me....it will be....<br />If it is a dream....<br />Wake me up...<br />Dun let me live in this dream....<br />Although it is sweet...<br />Why???<br />It hurts everytime I sink deeper...<br />It hurts to believe in something that is not there...<br />It just hurt so badly to keep going on...<br /><span style="font-size:85%;"></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-8757096943837450821?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-80681429521116805412009-05-08T20:40:00.000-07:002009-05-08T20:51:01.467-07:00I used to see u like seeing through a window...<br />I can tell wat r u thinking...<br />I know wat r u bout to say...<br />I used know everything bout u...<br />Now....<br />All I know bout u is...nothing<br />I have no memories of u...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-8068142952111680541?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-91292721966399962272008-12-31T08:46:00.000-08:002008-12-31T09:16:05.825-08:00How much more time do i hav??<br />1 days...1 weeks....1 month...1 years...<br />Memories are the only thing tat remain....<br />Till the every last minute...<br />Wishing for more time was impossible....<br />It din stop...<br />Taking you away from me....<br />Till i can no longer feel ur warmth...<br />All i wanted to give u was happiness...<br />But now...all tat is here is memories to remind me of u....<br />No matter how hard i try....<br />Your memories starts to slowly fade away....<br />Leaving nothing behind for me....<br />No matter how hard i try to remember...<br />Nothing come back....nothing...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-9129272196639996227?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-12676808296404714442008-10-31T00:20:00.000-07:002008-10-31T00:36:39.996-07:00Let's go back to wat we were before....<br />Let's smile like nothing happen...<br />Forget all the memories tat we have...<br />We shall be stranger in each other eyes forever...<br />Tat way we can live without feeling guitly...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-1267680829640471444?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3936808859046084633.post-73334802535831848842008-09-12T00:50:00.000-07:002008-09-12T01:12:56.321-07:00Living in happiness...<br />Full with hope...<br />Protected with love...<br />Everywhere fill with light...<br />I wonder if those kind of place exist...<br />Will there be a place for me???<br />Will i find everything tat i always wanted??<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/3936808859046084633-7333480253583184884?l=gurldoll.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>* Gurl Doll *noreply@blogger.com0